scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
The only thing he got me during our relationship was a cum stain in my backseat. I choose winners.
Not really fighting over the same girl. He takes her out to dinner and then I come over and fuck her. We've worked out the perfect relationship.
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
And the best part is that she's coming home to find that I completely shaved her dog.
riding the spinning bikes at the rec after Valentines Day was a baaddddd idea
Apparently as she was dragging me out of the club, I was clinching onto this european guy screaming at Jenna: that's the 12th time you've cockblocked me tonight
Idk every story shes told me thats started with "back when i was a lesbian" has been my new favorite story
I'm at work. It's margarita night. Someone literally just shouted "MURICUH!"
God bless us, everyone.
Can you explain to me why there are fake boobs glued on my chest?
Thanks for getting me stoned. My manager started quizzing me about the menu and I struggled until he asked me to describe the tortilla soup. I said "tasty"
In the middle of having sex she stopped, said "guess what, it's clitoris awareness week" and then continued fucking me
Me and some girl at the bar just high fived for not wearing bras
2014 decided to stick it to me one last time. Right up the ass.
At least Shia Labeouf would encourage me to do this drinking contest
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