we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
would you object to me following you around all the time with a video camera and selling it to TV? Your life could make me millions.
i just saw a woman using her birth control packet as a wallet.
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
No... We were arguing over whose family is more dysfunctional... Then my brother stumbled in and puked all over jakes ugly dog.
It's like his dick is pushing through his pants and driving him over here.
Only thing I know is apparently I danced with a bouncer and we got a ride back from a valet who was driving one of the cars he was supposed to be parking
You didn't know it was a gay bar until the 7th guy rejected you. You were crying because you thought it was just a bad night. No more for you.
He turned me into a screamer. Guess I'm really not a lesbian.
after attempting to eat a candy cane bigger than my hand i have determined there's no way to eat this that doesn't seem erotic
I was a bouncer for about 90 seconds until the real bouncers figured out that I was doing their job
We were having sex and my nose just started pouring blood. He reached down to the floor, grabbed a sock and held it to my nose. He just kept pounding away like nothing was happening.
How do you tell a woman that you are seeing that the scars on your back are from her awesome-in-bed little sister?
I have a whole new respect for her. She chugged half a bottle of jack daniels, and then peed all over his wall. Serves him right.
I just had a mini meltdown cause I thought they forgot to put the cheese packet in my mac and cheese. I'm having an awful week.
Randomize
