Let's hustle tonight so we can relax tomorrow
Perfect. Like where your heads at
By relax I mean have sex
If someone cant be won over with guacomole and tequila they are not worth your time.
I'm watching this guy on intervention hospitalized for liver damage. He's drinking the hand sanitizer in the hospital room. Say hello to your future.
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
This dude is being a total douche
Just because it's Christmas Eve does not mean the liquor store has to give you a free bottle of peppermint schnapps
dude. you ripped the mardi gras beads off the girls neck and yelled she didnt deserve them..
Using the salt from a pretzel bag for tequila shots. Come over.
I just saw my first passed out person, sprawled out on the sidewalk like they died. I wanted to take a pic but I thought that screamed "tourist"
how much ball-pain constitutes an emergency?
I legitimately forgot how to blow my nose just now. Sleep might be handy.
I sent you a snap of me in the bath, and you sent me a snap of a taco. An actual taco.
Do you think it would be a margarita if you just out tequila in a sonic slush?
We're making a scrapbook of dick pics, you want in or what?
there must be tiny pirates in the freezer stealing our rum.
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
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