so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
the cops didnt even say happy birthday to me :(
Taking the airport shuttle drunk should not happen this often in my life.
yea, their son has been arrested on more than one occassion, their daughter is pregnant and their other daughter graduated but she was adopted, so clearly genes are everything.
Swear to god this chicks brother got let out of jail for the weekend for the sole purpose of cock blocking me
"The juvenile turned and faced the officer, unzipped his pants, placed a fresh cigarette in between his legs and preceded to light it with a match"
Gravity stopped and i'm discussing Greek philosophy with two guys I don't know. There's someone asleep on me. We need to use their dealer.
Hey, remember when Hot Stuff played in the back of the ambulance? Or no, cause of your concussion...
he looks SO much like Drake, I feel like an extreme groupie every time we have sex.
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
Eredayimstrugglin ..Can we talk about the fact that I just typed "er" and it autocorrected to that. Fuck my life.
Hahahaha yep. You were picking up the credit card machine and singing to it in Spanish.
My sack is cleanly shaven and the rest of my body has been manscaped. i even put aftershave on my junk. i feel sleek like a fighter jet right now.
Had phone sex with my boss who I still haven’t seen in person. How’s your Monday ?
ill let you put your finger in a lot of things. but a ring is not one of them.
Randomize
