If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
My foreign exchange student got here today. I turned on man vs. food and told her that "this is all you need to know about America."
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
So my girlfriend used a threesome to tell me she wanted to leave me for a girl... Not entirely sure how I should feel about that.
He said to me this morning that we should finish these beers, go and get plan B then on the way back, go to the pub to celebrate the death of our baby. I love Manchester.
the remote is under the fat chick passed out on the couch. Good luck .. and may god have mercy on your soul.
I'm hungover and surrounded by children and Republicans. What did I do to deserve this?
In times of desperation, never...NEVER put green apple scented hand sanitizer on your vagina.
PAAAANTS ARE FOR AAAASSHOLES
Full disclosure. I fucked the fatty from work and shit is weird now.
Well, if worst comes to worst, I have pictures of his penis that I can put on the internet
MY GOD DAMN TV STOPS WORKING EVERY TIME I AM THIS FUCKING HIGH. WHY MUST IT TORMENT ME?!
If sending nudes to tinder boy is considered functional then yes.
Also I feel like death. But like. In a good way
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
Randomize
