I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
you know what would be great? if dirt tasted like steak and could get you drunk.
he is the anna nicole to my 90 year-old billionaire. i'm grateful that he's fucking me, so i'm buying him shit.
She was really sick last night--but i was too drunk to bring her chicken noodle soup after the bar, so went by taco bell and got her a chicken burrito instead
She eyed me up from across the bar and mouthed "I have no gag reflex".
So where are we on this whole, you write my paper...i do sexual favors situation?
If only we could all 3 say fuck school to be stoner flight attendants
I'll be really easy to find... I'm the naked one rolling around in cats.
I seriously think the toilet is the cleanest thing in their house. At least if I have to worry its not about that.
THEY HAVE VIAGRA FLAVORED GELATO
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
Sitting on the toilet ... Eatin pizza with one hand, petting my cat with the other. I love a sad drunken life
Is it sad to eat a candy bra by yourself?
I got all the way to work before I realized there were Trojans in my bra.
admittedly, geting that drunk in front of my last two exes wasnt a good idea
probably didn't help that you cheated on them with each other either
Randomize
