Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
She crushed my hand with the box spring last time, so it's all good.
It's that thing where you don't have any food so you just drink beer to get your needed calories for the day.
Well, I've taken the art of car peeing to new heights
I'm starting to think I didn't bring enough liquor for this family Christmas.
It's 2 pm....
he could've at least fucked me twice. that's just common courtesy.
Had sex with one of the guys from Ireland. Celebrating st pattys early.
My vagina has a heartbeat. That means I'm in love, right?
You know the party's good when you say "Never have I ever caused an emergency landing" and someone drinks
He puked in the middle of it and I still wasn't disappointed.
I'm talking to this guy I met online about French toast. I am the oddest fucking combination of hungry and horny. Wtf brain.
have fuck
*fun
actually forget it have a fuck too it'll do you good
JB just got pulled over and I am in the trunk...... this isnt good
You still owe me one bodily function mess clean up.
You pee on the floor one time and you never hear the end of it...
Idk if I want to put a bra on
Randomize