I found your undies. They were wrapped around my leg.
Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
I just wanna be some guy's midlife crisis
She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
i just watched a special on porn, the business isn't doing so good. You may want to wait before you start your career
I can't wait to see you, I've been doing mouth stretches for the past 2 days
I think i just threw up blood. i can't chill right now;
He is getting married. In the time it took for this conversation he probably cheated on her three times
And then she sprinted three blocks through live traffic towards McDonalds screaming "THE GOLDEN ARCHES ARE CALLING ME"
You put on a bike helmet, yelled "doesn't matter fuck it" then punched a stick the fire
It was the highest I'd ever been. I felt like a blob. A blob eating a burrito.
there is something very satisfying about getting tacos after hours of sex.
There are peanut butter donuts now. We are playing with forces we can't possibly understand.
I passed out in your bed last night...there maybe a snickers and twix bar under your pillow
I'm not sure what happened. There's a frozen waffle in the floor and he's walking around with a curtain rod and making planes out of bread slices...
Randomize
