Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
i asked him to tell me something nice and he said "your vagina is really tight."
I wish Pampers made couches for people like us.
I used the picture of my mom and I doing blow job shots in Vegas in the presentation for my Spanish final. Graduation here I come.
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
you were passed out so I asked you what my name was and you opened your eyes and yelled "ricotta cheese"
no way
that's when i decided you were gonna be okay
I seem to have forgotten that I am wearing a one piece bathing suit under my clothes
Yeah I went home with her... She had me take off everything but my shirt and from across the room goes, "Now dance. Just dance that dick over here"
How many band members does it take to become The Band Slut? I think I might be dangerously close
You're 21st was epic. I woke up at 6 a.m. on the floating beer pong table in the pool with a beer still in hand. Didn't even spill any
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
I've officially slept with/dated two guys that have gotten tased. What the fuck is wrong with me
Why is there a mildly painful bruise on my back?
You slipped off the sink last night.
Why was I on the sink......?
;)
Do you remember feeding the vacuum doritos last night?
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