i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
This is your Morning Wood Report: I have it.
My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
there comes a time in a mans life when you ask yourself, will i fake love for blowjobs? and the answer is always yes
She checked into foursquare right as she left work so he would think she was there late and not on some other guy's dick
I have to say for barely passing high school, that girl is a genius.
Fun fact: female penguins have sex in exchange for pebbles to build nests. I now know what im being for halloween
He tried to say the picture wasn't him. Like I'd forget his curved boner.
Game over. He has a paternity test request on his table.
Hospital. He tried giving some kid a stone cold stunner during a real fight.
I woke up with flowers, a tiara & pasta salad in my bed. Tequila makes me act like a fat Disney princess
I puked walking onto the plane. How do you think my post-Birthday hangover went?
The Medal of Honor you banged could be at the inauguration today. You really dropped the ball on keeping up with that one.
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
It's gotten to the point where waking up in my own apartment is a surprise
her and her boyfriend kept giving me coke ad kissing me talking about my awesome boobs
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