Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
got some bad news about ur virginity. she didnt make it thru the night
Oh no, it isn't official until she poops.
It's a shame that I don't know his last name. Actually, it's an ever bigger shame that I don't know his first name
we cant have a funnel and a dog. thats a lot of responsibility
After doing lines off my chest, she said, "do you even know how fast I could suck your cock right now?!!" and her friend said, "yea she totally could".
The good news is the bleeding stopped. I think I'm going to sober up before I tell you the bad news though.
I just woke up to find the whole kitchen sick had been converted into a gravity bong.
I had a dream she was puking on me, but sadly in real life she was puking on me too
I tried to convince the Lobo Card people to take my pic with my sunglasses on because I will probably always be this hungover.
You know how hard it is to jerk off in a bathtub with a dog staring at you?
I'm tellin ya, let the nipple get some air, they'll hire u on the spot, lawyers love a little nip
Woke up to the frozen soundtrack blasting in the living room best one night stand ever
Are you drunk texting me again or are you just being your regular stupid self?
yes
She had a toddler. It threw up and then some guy said party foul and put it on the porch. Going back next Friday.
Randomize