party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
just walked past a group of stoners who were staring open jawed in the spice aisle. tonight they will stumble upon something amazing.
Just saw a british exchange student take a flyer for free dental care. Yes.
I just had a flashback of me saying "I'm not ready to be a deadbeat mom" lastnight.
He turned off the music when i walked in and introduced me to everyone. then they gave me jager and made me chug it while holding a giant purple dildo. everything resumed when i finished
You know when you blow me it's the softest, most amazing feeling ever. Like putting my dick in a silk bag filled with puppy ears.
all i remember is walking in on u shitting and crying listening to shawty get loose. its safe to say this break up has taken a toll on u
Cops on bikes. I think I can outrun them.
I played "in the air tonight" on a drum set made of titties, and I'm not even exaggerating
Yea we just broke up
so do we start sexting now or later?
Well, after emptying the contents of my stomach into a fucking rose bush, the only things moving through my digestive system are pills, coffee, and my own lip gloss. If that gives you any idea what kind of a day I'm having.
too bad we didn't bet. my 38-1 tears would have made great lubrication for a blow job.
I screamed "You look like a guy I've fucked!" to your brother at a party... I have some explaining to do.
They left a cherry picker with the keys in it on a college campus, what else were we supposed to do?
Either im seeing the northern lightgs, someone is having a rave, or im on acid.. Im most likely on acid
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