If i could bang her from 80ft away, I would
woke up this morning with a fat chick but she went downstairs and made pancakes without saying a word.
So at what point do I tell her that I like fucking these hot southern girls more than I like my relationship with her?
Just found my shirt from Saturday, got an automatic contact buzz.
we've decided whoever is stupid enough to use the condom that's tacked to the wall deserves to get pregnant.
You're like my zumba instructor for alcoholism right now
You gotta pick a side. My suggestion: side with tits.
Are you up yet? I really want to know if i tried sleeping in a field... i have the vaguest memory of trying to
If we're single and alone together, the fuck angels shall sing upon our nude bodies.
Though I do have to question why i found you and my brother passed out on his bedroom floor, no clothing between you except his tie wrapped around your dick
He told me I have nice nipples. You can't just tell someone that and then leave the state!
Literally had a conversation with the pizza as to why it was a bad idea to reach in the back seat and grab a slice while driving. The pizza was right, it was safer to just wait until I got home.
All my friends are getting into relationships and going through breakups and I'm having Plan Bs and crunch wraps for dinner.
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
Went online to check my credit card... $147.87 at Waffle House. $632.36 at "Red Rose Gentleman's Club" and a $1000 cash advance from an ATM. I may no longer be a fiancé.
Randomize
