i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
He can't get past my hymen. At least that's what he said it feels like.
dude are you gonna smoke tonight? my day was shit and I wanna get high
worker bees can leave....even drones can fly away....the queen is their slave
nevermind....I'm on the way
whos cum tastes better, a guy who drinks apple juice or cranberry juice?
So I made him an imaginary sandwich and told him that the day I didn't have to fake it, neither would he.
There's a bed on the roof. The window behind it is too small for it to go through. I'm impressed.
Please God, is a penis possibly making it to vagina town to much to ask for tonight.
I'm pretty sure at any given moment you could wring out my liver and get a couple of shots of jäger.
I've counted four places at work I need to get laid in. Come help me accomplish this.
Hey, I'm your guy
Multi-day drunkenness is to binge drinking as black diamonds are to skiing. They're tough and confusing and you hurt afterwards, but you did it and you probably got an alright story along the way.
please remind me of this if i ever start out a night declaring my goal is to see how much american honey it takes for me to forget who i am again
Life should not be this hard with a dick this big.
Would you be opposed to me keeping a live lobster in the shower for a bit?
I'm definitely drunk. At the gyno. On my birthday. Life is a joooooooke
I just want this to serve as a reminder in the morning that the topic of conversation at last call was the penis size of jesus.
Randomize