Tonight was fucked up. First my mom called me and told me I had to go to the bar to pick up my dad 'cause he was drunk. Then when I got there my dad was doing a body shot from this lady who happened to be my 1st grade teacher. By far the most awkward car ride home. Idk if I should tell my mom or not.
i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
His shirt was in the kitchen sink this morning, I'm pretty sure my roommates know.
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
And then he used the flashlight app to illuminate me giving him head. Thanks IPhone
Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on
We saluted the chips to the national anthem before cooking them. The house has to get a munchies fryer
You just sat there and yelled "I JUST WANT TO RUB MY NIPPLES"
Maybe before the beach I should get a tracking chip in my arm.
I fell into his fridge. I want to leave.
On another note, I feel like my vagina is slowly being peeled off with a rusty potato peeler.
I could be busy drinking my face off and getting red white and bruised per usual
You don't understand. On her lunch break she sits on the roof, stares into the sky, and chain smokes. I can't get on her level. She is made up of java monsters with whiskey and a voice that sounds like sex.
You need to stop crushing on your boss or fuck her.
We cuddled after till the morning. Then he woke up sober... and straight.
It was kind of like hidden Mickey ears, but with dicks.
Randomize
