It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
it tastes like there's a party in my mouth and everyone is throwing up
omg i finished an entire carton of double double chunk chunk ice cream last night...
what? what exactly is in double double chunk chunk?
self-loathing.
We planned for the zombie apocalypse. In great detail. Of course there was booze involved.
he's doing fine. just headbutted the wall and threw up
Tried to dry my shoes in the oven last night.
I dont know, but the way you were flopping around and gurgling made me scared that you were actually drowning in the carpet.
Sex and sushi don't even sound good right now... I might be on my death bed. To my Liz, I leave my extensive movie collection and my drinking supplies. To Olive I leave my car. Cause every Scottish terrier needs a 2010 Camaro.
Nothing says "forever alone" like receiving a friendship bracelet from your parents.
If you enjoy dance recitals as much as I do, that's one shitty Father's Day...
I just added Tubthumping to the playlist for tonight. This is going to make or break the party.
I don't know how to reply to him. 'I'm glad the ecstasy my friend tricked you into taking wore off'...? It just doesn't seem sincere
And at the semi-adult age of 25 I have shit my pants. Not even drunk, just really late to work. Is this real life?
I dont remember you getting a condom thrown at you. I think I had a concusion
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
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