Get your hand out of your ass!
how did you know my hand was in my ass? Guess where my other hand is..?
In your belly button
I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
I wish i was in the wii world.
just upgraded from jello shots to jello bowls blacking out just got that much more delicious
Good thing you didnt wake up last night. Wouldve found me naked talking to my closet asking to borrow my towel.
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
At a St Pats house party. Just raised $110 for two short chicks to crawl into a dog cage together. Video forthcoming. Respect.
You cant carve pumpkins without vodka. It's a Halloween tradition.
They should incorporate dolphins into professional surfing
I did all i could do but i woke up smelling like cigars and theres salsa all over my face
Masturbating to death wouldn't be a terrible way to go. If you die tonight, I'll know how it went down. Promise not to tell your family.
Why are you naked at 4pm?
Its my birthday, I dont have to wear clothes
isnt it crazy how for years we were living our owns lives, and now only a wall seperates us?
stop. eating. my. shrooms.
He was out clubbing with his SON. WHY did you let me KISS HIM? Also WHERE WAS HIS SON?!
There better be alcohol at this child's birthday party. Seriously not trying to be entertained by a clown while I'm still sober.
Randomize
