I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
Had a 3 sum last night, and today food just taste better and the air seems so much fresher!
If you stick your dick in my spaghetti, we're fighting.
i prefer some hard alcohol, but wine makes me feel less of a progressive alcoholic
We should probably avoid doing this again, but hey it was a nice one time thing to tell the grandkids about... Hopefully they don't end up being YOUR grandkids.
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
I bought something for you today. You'll love it.
What is it? Drugs?
I mean I'm so obviously classy currently laying in bed watching a movie while finishing my drink from last night
while he was teaching, every time he said "wet" he would look at me, that's what you get for sleeping with the professor's assistant
Please call us Steph is okay but missing phone wallet tooth
You know it's NBA season when you compare head to 3 pointers.
He fucked me for my Netflix login, I fucked him for his HBO login, and actually I think that's beautiful
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
avocado toast wont fix the fact you did a bunch of blow you fucking hipster
momentary stint on a second floor library computer...guy next to me snorted blue adderall off his notebook through a cut straw, i cant tell if this guy is my hero or just plain crazy...
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