how do you wash the taste of whore out of your mouth?
Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
i just declared my major based on how close the department building was to our apartment. laziness has been brought to a new level
When we were eating pie last night, I dropped some, and not only did you not judge me for far surpassing the 5 second rule, you let me use your foot to sock mop with. You're a good friend.
I don't listen when you talk. I just try to find new creative ways to get you to send me naked pictures.
Hold your horses dude. Titty pics are a work of art.
I wish everyone could suck his dick. It was an honor.
Dude, she set my Tinder preference to men, set the radius to 100 miles, and used up all of my right swipes. I think she's mad.
I threw up in a wendys bag in her car. when i went to throw it out the window it exploded all over me. No I don't think there will be a second date.
Can you repeat that, but with context?
Nothing says depression like laying in your bed stoned, naked, and eating a cupcake
He's ready to settle down, whereas I'm like "More shots please"
I wore my lizzie mcguire socks to the bar last night. Because that's how i get all the ladiez
21st birthday weekend in Vegas has concluded and all I'm missing is my underwear and 'Contacts' icon on my phone home screen.
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