I told a kindergarten student that candy canes are bones of reject elves.
please quote me on this- the only thing worse than being ugly is being ugly and thinking that you're pretty
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
She got stuck in the front door. She never told me how or why.
There's never a time that i stay at this apartment that when i wake up in the morning and sit outside to smoke a cigarette that i don't feel ashamed of myself.
Im wearing all my glow sticks to bed so i know where my arms are at all times.
My living room is scattered with glow sticks wrappers, sparklers, face paint & beer cans?
It's not as cool looking when the drugs wear off, is it?
Do pleather leggings scream im easy on a first date?
you kept saying "i will not *breathe* regret this *breathe* in the morning *breathe* i just gotta remember *breathe* to BREATHE"
I have nothing to say for myself. When 2chainz comes on at the bar all bets are off.
I am slightly proud of the fact his mom turns on the dryer located behind the spare bedroom EVERY time we visit!
can we not compare my dick to a children’s folk tale
I have seen you puke and 5 mins later rock my world. So there is hotness there that average people will never see..
I'm pretty sure my therapist gave me the green light to fuck him.
I am really drunk and also a zombie.
Randomize
