At a place where you lie naked on a big pile of pillows and they feed you lobster. You eat it with your bare hands.
Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
She said I was really immature but whatever...oh by the way we just bought a toilet and turned it into a beer bong so come over
Someone should tell Glenda that I only hang with her because she makes me look prettier.
I'm sitting by the window waiting for the sun to go down so that I can start drinking.
Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
Some mysterious chinese delivery man dropped off 2 free egg rolls. Clutch
we found you under the sink... we opened up the doors and you told us to go away because you were playing indian in the cupboard
Text me when you wake up so I know you're ok. It's really worrisome to get home at this hour and find 3 men passed out in my room but no you. Love you, goodnight. :-)
I just tried on my "outfit" for tonight and I should just wear sweatpants and a sign on my face that says I like it in the ass. That would be more comfortable
I would totes reciprocate the nip pic, but I'm sick with a piece of tissue shoved up one of my nostrils and I'm just not feeling that ambitious. Sorry.
My roommate is fucking his gf in the shower and i really have to pee do i just bust in or pee on his bed
is it fucked up if I wear crotchless panties to thanksgiving to make it easier for me to fuck my cousins friend.
God I love you.
FUCK WHALES
Not to be gross and awkward, but I just had sex outside in the rain on the hood of a lexus
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