oh my god I didn't know your sister was this good at french kissing
I don't make mistakes...just understandable bad choices.
After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
You looked cold, so i decided to make you a blanket out of sticky notes.
Just come back with most of your limbs...and your dick. Please and thank you
seriously when did my vagina become a soup kitchen for the poor
I'm so in the Halloween spirit, I zombified my all of my nudes on my phone. Tell me this isn't creative.
How high are you?
I feel like breakfast can just fly into my mouth
At first I was horrified but then he explained that he shave a "soul patch" on his balls... And I was still horrified, but I went with it.
My gynecologist got a full view of the obviously bite marked shaped bruises on my thighs. I just kept talking about work and hoped she wouldn't judge me.
I remember us getting kicked out of the bar, but neither of us know why. We woke up next to chicken bones on a plate with spoons, and my car has mud all over it including places where feet shouldn't be, like the speakers on the car door.
I'll give you some choices for what to get me for Christmas. 1.You naked. 2.You naked 3.You naked.
It was an all night sausage fest and I was the lady of honor.
I feel like sleeping with foreign people is a long term investment. It's like a time share. Now when I go to London I have a place to stay.
Randomize
