are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
I wish there was a Glade Plug-in for vaginas
Day two of vacation and my first drink of the day is a plan b colada
Pretending to care to care about playoffs in exchange for free shots. I'm sorry in advance.
there is nothing like a happy birthday present when you wake up with a bow on your vagina.
Oh god. Standing was a rash decision
I made it to Starbucks to do work and I've just been sitting here with my head on the table for 30 minutes...
I thought monday through wednesday was a YOLO free zone.
I guess I'm open to more types of dick now
Yea. I feel great. My life is great. My job isn't as shitty. And my daddy loves me. I love strip clubs. Great self esteem boost.
I'm not going to say what I did. You're smart enough to figure it out. But I did it. And you owe me 20$
how fucking stupid do you have to be to think I'm going to accept your friend request months after falling asleep during one night stand sex?
Give me 20 minutes.. I'm going to need to start off with an orgasm to get through this day
I guarantee you he will only fuck with old bitches from now on
This sucks! All of the twenty something dick I was getting went home when the university closed
The neighborhood cougar just purred at me while I was doing yard work. I’m terrified and tumescent
Randomize
