BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
You owe me 10 bucks. He wasnt in jail. Found him at 530 this morning when the smoke alarm went off. He passed out naked in the middle of cooking bacon. No idea where he was before that.
i just taught a 3 year ld how to do a jager bomb, i cant wait to have kids
Don't put random dicks in your mouth or any other crevice for that matter... and i'm home in 30 seconds
Wish I got that text last night instead of this morning.
There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
I just saw someone marching around outside wearing only a loincloth, dragging a fuckton of sheet metal. Spring has Sprung.
I just want you to know I tipped the cab driver $10 last night because I felt bad that he didn't have healthcare.
I will also be strapping forties to the puppies.
You were force feeding yourself jello and you kept repeating, "I will not surrender"
And all I ask is the occasional "welcome home from work" blowjob.....and for you to fold my laundry. I hate folding laundry
All my interactions with my brother are drug deals at this point
We had sex on the tiger blanket while I was wearing my Ukrainian shirt and my ass touched the Ukrainian flag. Happy 25th Ukraine!
I'm in the Sheetz parking lot waiting for dad to finish a drug deal.
So I ended the trip with two cold sores, poison ivy on my leg and vagina, and no alcohol or weed. WORST. 4TH. OF. JULY. EVER.
Well, for starters, you were growling and slurping beer from a puddle on the carpet. Let's all hope that was beer...
Randomize
