Soo i just shotgunned a water balloon...
Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
i've never seen someone fall down the steps so gracefully... i think im in love
Abby. I can text perfectly. I pledge allegiance to the flag of the united states of america. and to the republic, for which we stand, one nation under god indivisible and with liberty and justice for all god bless america
I can't figure out how to get this beer bong in my carry on without airport security questioning me as it goes through the x-ray.
I dont care if your mom convinced you it should be an abstinent christmas. I did horribly on finals and i'm out of booze, so you will get over her and FUCK. ME. NOW.
Please stop using me as a reference for bail bondsmen.
So I found a skull ring inside me this morning. I'm assuming its yours, so I'll leave it in my mailbox for you - it looks expensive.
I'm pretty sure the guy in front of me at Walmart doesn't have good plans. It's one am he is buying a flash light and black bandanna
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
Would you go as one half of Harry and Lloyd in Tuxes to Aaron's wedding?
Have you ever had to act sober and talk to an authority figure in a coconut bra? Because it is just as degrading as you would imagine.
Remember that time you puked in the middle of wendy's?
Yeah, why?
The staff still remembers me for cleaning it up. Thanks for the free frosty and fries
I accidentally put Bacardi in my coffee this morning. I ain't even mad.
what a classic moment of my life. A buffet of taco bell and a taser gun.
Randomize