Is there a "Plan B" app for my iphone?
i just woke up in the hallway. not my hallway. i officially raise my hand to be DD next week.
I was to drunk to walk in jimmy john's so I called and got a pickle delivered to me outside the bar , too much?
Recently successful and happy relationships are at an all time high now that you are no longer fucking so many peoples girlfriends. You alone have changed the mating patterns in the lower half of our county.
You need to stop relating my life to your schoolwork. But tell my girlfriend that she'd be proud.
New high score, I made the stripper choke me while I was getting a lap dance last night
You'd think the neighbors would be used to grown men coming into my house drunk at 230 am.
Dude this weed smells so good they should make it into a Vicks vapor rub scent and I would rub it all over myself.
oh man that would be weird.. i feel like we should do dirty things before anything super intimate like a massage.
Well, I woke up on a roll-away, with a knot in the back of my head and penis confetti stuck to me. Also, I apparently literally gave the shirt off my back right before I passed out, so I was topless. Vegas won this trip.
I'm literally rolling on acid for the first time during Thanksgiving. Help me.
Be happy for me... Or horny... Or be a really good friend and feel what I want you to feel. Jealousy
He played Harry Potter Fan Fiction videos to get me in the mood. He might be the one.
How do I explain to work that I woke up in my underwear on a trampoline and that I'm not coming in?
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
When do you estimate your next shower will be? Several people have asked.
Randomize
