Is being a pregnant whore worse than an average one?
Sometimes I wonder why.. Then I realize I can't fool myself with that question bc we all know it's bc of his enormous dick
i hate always having to make my eye shadow look really good since my eyes always end up closed by the end of the night in pics
and on the fourth day, god made foam parties.
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
Oh man, buzzed lunch fridays almost got out of hand.
The dopest dose you'll ever dose. I felt like an octopus all of thursday
I dapped up a cop while leaving the party
I thought 5 times was beyond my capabilities but her tongue was like a penis defibrillator. Clear!
I went shopping for a dress that was baptism and bar appropriate.
6 hours ago I jacked off a a guy for $100. I explained it away as "compensation" for gas and tolls. WHAT am I doing with my life? Quickest and easiest $100 I ever made though, haha
I'm drunk and kinda wanna go home but now I have to go have more sex, my boxers are in the dryer
Dude I'm pretty sure everyone in my office knows I fucked our boss...can I ask for anything better?
So, 'head before the store' turned into a fuck fest, & that's how I ended up at the grocery store smelling like a cum farm on Black Friday. How's your weekend?
She called a 10 year old handsome and we gave her a look that was equal parts confused and “what the hell is wrong with you”
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