put your butt on the phone this is a booty call
His mom made me a necklace that i am supposed to wear to prom. She included a note with it, which had a star trek quote. What have I gotten myself into?
I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
he just put it in my mouth and said "go"
It was like watching Stephen Hawking try to swim.
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
She vajazzled her vag. It was as useless as putting earrings on chewbacca
Wella between the drunkards, the inevitable slutty costumes, and someone doing a BODY SHOT OFF A PREGNANT GIRL, i lost my halloween spirit. Bah humbug.
Hey texans ride hard. He should have known what he was in for when I asked to sit on his face. The broken nose was a BADGE he just earned.
Btw kudos to your tongue last night. Sorry about that lady jizz in your beard.
You raged at the rock climbing place for not selling beer and then just said "fuck it" and pulled out a flask.
Pretty sure I used toilet water to wash vomit off my face last night...
you asked the cab driver if he wanted to meet your parents, last night.
Randomize
