Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
i might even pee on it at walmart i am so nervous
i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
I feel like a really awesome person when i have to check my roof for things i've lost
Last I remember we played rock paper scissors for who would fuck the guy with cowboy boots on and I won..
It was so weird. She left to go to the bathroom and her older sister leaned towards me with a creepy smile and said, "You don't deserve her" and then continued to stare at me with a crazy expression for the rest of the evening.
That's kinky shit dude.
But the real question is how many people didn't see my dick last night?
His and hers buttplugs were a resounding success. Tru luv
I seriously have her in my phone as "Legit 8"...even I'm surprised
He's talking about me being Slave Princess Leia and how he'll chain me up. I don't have the heart to point out that he would be Jabba in that scenario...Is it bad that his lack of SW knowledge is destroying my lady boner?
Last night I had a sex dream about Trudeau, he hasn't even been prime minister for 24 hours
I thought I needed to get laid. Turns out I just needed pasta.
Just don't let me do two things: Beer bongs filled with vodka or shot competitions
And now, by the power vested in me by the state of intoxication, I now pronounce you fucking awesome.
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