Why do you have Season One of Reba in your underwear drawer?
Why are you in my underwear drawer?
you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
dude I just realized something - girls return my clothes washed so in thought bringing girls home is like avoiding going to the laundramat
There are the 2 BIGGEST tools by me-- at our table. I hate them. But they're not ugly and I may make out with them later. And hate myself. Definitely hate myself.
I'm taking last night back. It officially didn't happen. Tell your friends.
I just got while a charlie horse while orgasming...most confusing feeling ever...
my momz letting me make the christmas card in photoshop
so that means christmas in space?
imma make our dead cats ghosts like obi wan kenobi
i had to get the starbucks manager to open the bathroom door for me...you passed out on the floor, the things i do for you
I mean, I know going to rehab probably didn't make her a lesbian, but I can always hope
Some guy offered you 100 bucks last night to suck your toes. I had to drag you away while you were yelling at me, "Stop money cock blocking me!"
That's just where I'm at in my life.
Perfect. Let's do that. I'm thinking everclear and green dye as our base. We shud start from there
I WANT PIZZA BUT I ALSO WANT SELF ESTEEM
BUT LIKE WHO AM I TO EVER CARE ABOUT SELF ESTEEM
Split a bottle of Johnny Walker and then decided to eat a shit ton of peanut butter. That was a rough bed to wake up in
You're wearing pigtails and giving away our kitchen appliances. Clearly, you're drunk.
On another note I never thought having a drug addicted stalker would prove useful
Randomize
