i'm chasing tequila w mint flavored ice cream, phil's chasing it w cream cheese, bashar's chasing it w pickles...i think we all know who the winner is....
but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
just once id like to meet someone on craigslist who isnt fat
I'm not going to fuck him in his Honda Fit. That's gay.
You made everyone who was on the patio sit on the floor and join your "ship" because you were the Captain. It was cool though. You let me be your 1st Mate.
if I die on the way please explain to my mother that I do not wear fishnets on a regular basis
I think it's starting to become crucial that I find a companion for my vagina.
I think that means you're growing up...when your coke nail becomes your opening mail nail.
Tell them to carpool to pride, have a 3way, and if one says 'no thanks' just tell em it's not gay if it happened in a 3way!
How early is too early to study with margaritas?
They asked me my level of pain at the hospital and I told them I called my ex 6 times
I'm trying to fuck him and feed him. I don't understand why it isn't working.
Some guy walking down the sidewalk just looked at me and said "hey it's the world champ". How drunk was I on Friday...?
He eats ass but won’t hold open doors. My kinda guy.
Chivalry really is dead.
Randomize
