At the bar. Guy comes up wearing a hollister shirt and says "lets blow this popsicle stand"
You fucking left with him didn't you?!
OMG. if college stays like this, theres no way i wont be pregnant by first semester
She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
He wasn't lying when he said he was immune to pepperspray. He pretended it burned for like 12 seconds and told the cops he was kidding he was alright. We'll be there soon.
Drunk in burger king. Having it our way. Free fries. M&m sundaes.
I did a hand stand against the glass wall at Ziggy's with no panties on and got 3 phone numbers. Thank God I shaved this morning...
Remember that time you came over to my house and I was on the porch naked and eating peanut butter?
Also, sorry about chilling in just the towel last night. You know I have ADD and somehow even after looking at you, I forgot I'm not the only person living there right now
Wait, tell the rest at happy hour. I wanna be able to interrupt you with my loud cackles and stupid questions.
why is there blood on my car? and are we still friends?
I wonder if you're allowed to smoke pot at Denver bronco games now...
Her hotness level dropped from an 8 to a 2 as soon as I walked into her place. It REEKED of cat piss and there was no litter box and NO CATS.
dude new orleans is fucking wild these two guys just performed dueling banjos except they were actually fighting with the banjos
All I remember is pissing by the garage and the next thing I know I'm on fire
You made me take you back to Mcdonalds so you could yell at the guy for not giving you enough ketchup packets
I vaguely recall french fries...
You then proceeded to call your mom and tell her you weren't coming home because you were "tripping balls"
Sweet...
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