Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
she tasted like a mixture of sweat and destiny
Hold on im havin a staring contest with my cat
I'm just trying to think of how much money Little Debbie would make if pot was legalized.
You insisted I take photos of you vomiting off the top of the tree.
My knee is bleeding. This cheeseburger is the 3rd thing I made out with today and I think I got a job with the ducks. Catalina is poppin
and i'm going to kill you for what you did to my nipples last night. of course i want to hang out
Was it high me or sober me who put those Jolly Rancher sticks in the freezer? I'd be soooo impressed if it was high me.
What can I say? I like my food like I like my women, not entirely fucked by our contemporary world.
Some guy offered you 100 bucks last night to suck your toes. I had to drag you away while you were yelling at me, "Stop money cock blocking me!"
That's just where I'm at in my life.
Best feedback on my performance so far: "There are things that can't be unseen."
Dude. She came to my room in nothing but a trench coat. Took it off and said, "you like" in her Costa Rican accent. God I love college.
he went down on me while I ate Oreos. I don't know what caused the orgasm.
I like to send nudes ok? If that's my biggest flaw I think I'm ok
..and by hang out i don't mean fucking then going back home i mean let's get something to eat & watch a movie and fuck sometime in between.
Randomize
