My unemployment check should really just be direct-deposited into the checking account of my drug dealer
this is the second time this summer that a girl has called me a ken dol
you shouldn't let them see you without your pants on
so i'm just gonna leave my credit card in your mailbox so you can bail me outta jail.. deal?
dont get mad but guess who just got banned for life from dodger stadium
He keeps whispering to me that he can't wait to tie my hands up with my wig?
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
I can't believe they didnt cut us off after we all hugged each other and started singing "were the 3 best friends that anybody could have" RIGHT IN FRONT of the bar and bartender...
there is no amount of schooling that prepares you for when your morbidly obese 45 year old patient tells you she has her clit pierced.
Passing out is my livers way of protecting my mind.
I told my doctor about us having twin chlamydia
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
Totally shot down my boss for sex today. Approaching this weekend with a clear conscience and an untouched vagina.
My mom just asked me about the teeth marks on my headboard..
I need to get some goddam control over my hormones
My thoughts mid terrible hookup: do people normally read a magazine right about now?
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