he was so hot that i framed the used condom. it's not trash, it's art.
there were more penises there than on chat roulette
you're wrong. we DID have sex last night. just ask your roommate. you seriously don't remember him asking to join us?
Did they have a limo or was i just stoned?
I feel like everything I touch in this bar I'm gonna get hepatitis. my kinda joint
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
My only regret is that we didn't pee on our neighbors Prius
Don't worry I'm alive. The apt is all locked up so I'm sleeping on the patio. The frozen pizza I got might be toast unless someone lets me in soon. If not its all good I'll be here snoring on the patio
I think I was the only one who knew you were acting like you weren't drunk in public issues discussion this morning. Make sure you thank me in your Academy Award Speech someday.
I could probably be laying here naked and he'd still be more interested in this thunderstorm
I saw him and didn't have sex with him. Responsibility five!
he took my bra off with his teeth, THEN decided he just wanted to make out and cuddle. i don't know what the female version of blue balls is, but i've been living with it since 1 a.m.
the only decorations on the Christmas tree were twinkle lights, condoms, and empty natty cans. I do love a classy holiday party
The amount of guys I've turned down for you is disgusting... You better love me.
oh.. my GOD my dad just text me... "i need a naked women" ........... help?
Randomize