She wanted to fuck you. You threw up on her. Congrats.
big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
Living right is spending a lot of time in someone's ass
There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
Swear. I think after passing out in a community college parking lot I can safely nominate myself for the piece of shit of the year award
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
im drinking italian dressing and watching dexter. its 230am. lets never drink on sundays again.
At the party. I feel like I just walked into a lifesize blunt.
no one was sober enough to set up jenga so we just threw the pieces at the last person to drink
I told this guy in the dining hall that he's a hippie god and he's never made eating yogurt so sexy
I like the fact that you've for some reason taken my penis into protective custody
It could happen. I haven't creeped the rest of the guest list yet.
Just creeped. Everyone is a passable 7. Orgy is a go!
Boobs have been pretty central in my life somehow lately which makes me question if I am truly gay
He is such a generous lover, I can look past the fact his name is fucking Bob.
the last thing I remember is taking a pull of ever clear and chasing it with vodka
Randomize
