If she's not going to maintain the upkeep of her vag then I'm not going to pay the rent of being her boyfriend
you need to do more things constructive for your career. like wearing pants more often.
he got instantly turned off in the middle of a blowjob when he heard the news "twilight beat the blockbuster record of batman"
My doc was like ur only supposed to have 6 sexual partners..thats just one semester at college
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
I am NOT getting arrested in a wig.
I knew I fucked up when I woke up with the meat scissors in my hand.
Leave it to us to have a family reunion in a bar bathroom
I'd just like to inform all involved that walking into a liquor store holding a milk crate at the beginning of a night as stock ends badly
If I can't get slightly excited by the thought of his face between my legs then I know I can never sleep with him.
I just realized the only way to play Edward forty-hands is commando in a skirt. This intelligence kick is really doing me justice.
Porn. Physics. Porn. Icecream. Porn. That's my life now.
I'M SORRY THIS WAS SEXTING AND I MADE IT SERIOUS.
Did we just second hand smoke crack?
i stood outside in the bushes for thirty minutes. Do you know how many drunk guys pee in bushes at 2 am?
Randomize
