We played Rock, Paper, Scissors last night to see who was the least drunk to drive.
The Rock won.
I don't know which is worse: knowing all the free porn websites, or knowing which days they update their free porn.
It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
i wish i was a boy too so i knew what a blow job felt like
Just had to throw up on the floor of my car during traffic on the way to work. Car next to me saw both times. Found the downside to having a job right after graduation.
I don't see what kind of idea someone could get from an envelope covered in jesus stickers and a note from a person and their dog. I'd say crazy person alert before flirting.
I'll reiterate. Best drinking game ever. I shall teach it to my children's children
Am I over stepping my bounds if I ask to fuck in your new bathroom?
It has heated floors
I think that thing where I have 2 boyfriends is happening again
Naw man, if he's crazy enough to jerk off on a public bus he's too crazy for me to fuck with
He just got really stoned and kept complementing my ponytail
Had a dream I was doing scat with Caroline. I need to lay off the cheese at night
oh you can't commit, don't have any real ambitions, and love to drink PBR? well.... sign me up!
I woke up to rachel asking "did anyone else fall out of a tree last night?"
The heart wants what the heart wants, and once again it’s a guy with brown hair, wears a chain, and has a nicotine addiction.
Randomize
