very cute, but more "I wanna put you in my pocket and keep you as a pet" and less "please bang me" type of cute.
physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
I wish everyone walked around campus with a video of what they did this weekend above their heads.
He really likes Obama...and Bill Clinton too. He said "I mean, how many presidents can say that they got head in the oval office?"
Soulmates.
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
I woke up in a place I've never been before, with people I've never met before using me as a table for domino's.
I had a dream that our used condom started talking to me. I told me that I did an amazing job, and told me that it saved me. From aids.
and my attempt at hiding my drunkness from my parents included walking into the wall as soon as they let me into the house.
She scratched my sunburn during sex. I didn't know whether to cry or cum
I fake pass out to avoid hookups sometimes. Last night I fake slept on my bathroom floor for like 2 hours before the guy left.
Smoked Hookah in the playhouse last night. Childhood was so fun.
I suppose I should wish you a happy one year of bumping uglies
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
He has a syndrome called asshole. And it flares up 24/7.
Dude I just woke up naked on the floor with my dick in a boot. Legit in a fucking boot. I also have no idea where I am.
Randomize
