So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
You drunk yet?
Nope. Give me two hours then delete my texts before you read them.
Cant make any promises.
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
Look at the bright side...I have an 11 inch penis
She just looked down there and said "i breed horses. this is better than anything ive ever seen."
A valiant attempt to obtain a backhoe was made
It's called the eyeliner-blowjob correlation, read a science book bro
I wanted to make fun of someone saying that to an untrained ear, skrillex is blah blah blah. But it was too soon after they said it. And now I can't find it. These are real problems.
That's always how I imagine things at your apartment...
Good, I'm glad you don't have some weird, skewed, clothed version of reality over here.
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
Can you come pick me up and take me to breakfast then the police station?
Where's your car?
The girl I brought home apparently stole it
I'm adopting to save the world from the moral outrage that would be my offspring
Do you ever look back on your life and think - man I should have never had sex with that guy
Like he legitimately was standing straight up, feet on the roof, not holding on to a moving car.
I'm still thinking about that amazing orgasm last night. I literally heard angels singing "Hallelujah!!"
Randomize
