We won't sleep together?
I just foul balled at work. I had taken off my coat too… had to go to the sink wash my hands then go back to the stall and pick up my coat. I hope the guy shitting in the stall next to me didn’t figure out what happened.
talking dirty on facebook chat is the new phone sex.
Hey. I found $5 in quarters from one of those state quarter collection books. I'm using it for food tomorrow.
This is one of those situations that make me think to myself "what life decision did I make to get here"
i want the original willy wonka imagination song to come on when i take a girl to my room
Yea I saw a friend of yours carrying your limp body somewhere
So apparently blacked out me judges a man based on what type of dinosaur he would be...
I built a fence. For the bunnies we're going to adopt. I'll fill you in when you get home.
I wouldn't say I LOVE Pacman. I mean, sure, I'd battle against you in an epic Pacman struggle for blow jobs and glory. But I mean, who wouldn't?
I taught a straight girl about grindr today. She showed me tinder. It was like some sexual cultural exchange program
Sorry about my life...
I've been really sick the past 4 days. Last night, I actually turned down a bj. I may be dying.
he is sitting in the driveway by himself laughing at nothing, idk what to do
MANIFESTATION IS REAL AND IM GETTING LAID TONIGHT
Randomize
