just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
I swear to god he was trying to crawl under my door last night muttering "I'm Alex Mac! I'm Alex Mac!"
How do I say to her "Have you eaten mango lately because my penis had an allergic reaction"
finally nailed that neighbor chick. hopefully i can get her wireless password now. free internet trumps moral standards any day
I turn the corner to find her walking in the front door in a tee-shirt, two different shoes and no pants. All she said to me was "I'm sad"
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
We got to the party at eleven, and the host was already in the hospital from being stabbed. And she brought the stabber home with us when we left.
I'm sitting at home, day drinking, while watching crossroads with brittany spears. I'm not the person you should be asking for advice right now.
Well girls crying gets you hard so you're not really a good standard to me
I will always make you feel special and slightly offended. That's my job.
So apparently nutella and chocolate body paint aren't actually the same thing.
are you listening to the theme from Jurassic Park whilst pooping?
He's hot....knda sweaty, drunk smells like feet....but he's hung like a whale....so in other words totally your type
Validation I posted a good pic? The lonely fuckboys send out the booty call signal. Of course I answered the call; Gotham needs its hero.
I AM OFFICIALLY LICENSED TO BE A LESBIAN
Randomize
