he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
I found her under my bed eating airplane pretzels.
I tried really hard to get you laid last night. And by that I mean I asked a bunch of dudes if they were top or bottom.
I don't remember anything but yelling at the ref in Spanish.
You lured him into the bathroom with a trail of jello shots, then proceeded to barricade the door with duct tape. You really should have thought that one through..
If the blood belongs to whoever dumped glitter all over my couch than the motherfucker got what was coming to them. If not, I hope they're ok.
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
Do you think he feels stupid trying to bang girls with his small penis? I'd be embarrassed.
Maybe you can hide out somewhere she would never go. Like a counseling center or AA
Would it be appropriate to cancel a hookup to watch the golden globes?
absolutely. tina fey and amy poehler trump everything.
I am so sorry for drunk texting you r kelly lyrics
OK, but next time I'd like to be present for our make-up sex.
To shove my foot up anybody ass who tries to start shit. I'm not takin shit this year. That and I wanna volunteer somewhere to help make a difference
I once broke a mans heart just to get laid by a premature ejaculator
How’d it go?
I accidentally joined a cult
So not great...
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