I think your x's eyes are broken his new girl is so hit
Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
never let anyone you met on skype borrow your car. lesson learned.
he's a bartender at a gay strip club. maybe he can work his magic. with getting u in, not gay magic.
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
I've broken several federal laws in the name of sex.
He literally just walked in some random persons house and walked right to they're pantry. Then five minutes later he walks out with pop-tarts, mac and cheese, and captain morgan. We need to chill with this kid more often.
I'll pull you in a wagon. You'll have a sash and a crown on and we'll sing "All the Single Ladies"
I was so stoned on the way to work, I pretended you were in the car with me. We sang "Mrs. Jackson" by outkast.
Everybody knows the last week of summer internships include showing up to the office hammered and hitting on the CEO
I've wasted nicer days than this hungover and dry heaving in bed.
It's time for everyone's favorite Wednesday night game... WHEEL OF. VODKA!!!!!
Hey... Tell me if you remember differently, but nobody truly saw me naked, right?
I don't know what's wrong with me. The guy from bar rescue is making me horny
He started humming a moment like this when I was taking off his pants.
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