Yeah unless I can find some idiot to make love to
wait.. the condom broke. ehh whatever i think im already 2 months pregnant
oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
I'm going to community service drunk, and I'm still going to be the most normal person there.
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
Just sit in your kitchen floor until something speaks to you.
Carry on my wayward bro, there'll be beer when you get low. lay your neon tank to rest, dont you rage no more.
It was worse than that time I did shots of BBQ sauce and pierced my own ear with a thumbtack
Ya well here is the deal with last night, it was the Biggest shit show we have ever co-stared in.
Dave called me blind fucking drunk thinking he was going to die from drinking with drake bell(wtf?) saying "it's all that drake motherfucker's fault" and later proceeded to tell me "you are my twitter"
I would eat the Denny's grand slam special out of my new probation officers b hole
How exactly does a handjob become fancy?
Blueberry lube, and champagne.
How drunk you think somebody has to be, that they think that putting out a profile pic like that can be even a slightly good idea?
Dude...itll be a youre-still-a-dick-but-a-hot-one-angry-hate-evil-spite kinda fuck. This is acceptable.
I'm really busy with my period
Randomize
