he said he didn't have a condom.
and you said?
that that's fine cause i was ready to be a mom. yeah - he magically had a condom he forgot about after that.
wtf. i just found you're porn stash.
u like it?
NOT THE POINT.
I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
dude, never let a drunk girl playbite your dick. the doctor came in laughed and left.
when i came out to my mom, it was over brunch. i was eating a banana. not exactly my smartest breakfast choice.
she was handing out condoms w/ her number on them...
I told him I'd put in a good word. And the word of the day is: NEGATIVE
I fell asleep with all the lights and heat on in the apartment with windows open, Earth Hour is lost on people like me.
If we ever start off with margaritas for breakfast and end up naked covered in olive oil...I could think of worse ways to spend a day.
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
there is nothing ok with the fact that that was the 4th time i peed in the same parking ramp
I awoke this morning alone and naked in my bed I forecast my date later not going so well because I have three giant hickies on my neck there is a note next to my bed that looks a 3rd grader wrote it on my college acceptance letter
She told me she ate a whole pizza today, and I just wanted to hug her forever.
I have a whole new respect for her. She chugged half a bottle of jack daniels, and then peed all over his wall. Serves him right.
All I fucking want right now is a cheeseburger the size of my face
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