i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
This morning my doorman told me it was an accomplishment for me to be standing and conscious after last night.
She's never allowed to turn 21 again
I havnt even moved into my new place yet and there's already a county sheriffs card taped to the door with my name on it asking me to call him
Just violated the laws of fuck-buddyship and talked to him about my personal life. I don't like it.
If it's any consolation, your boobs looked awesome.
im destined to be single forever. i hope its okay if your kids come and hang out with my cats.
Just described your amazing cock to a complete stranger. I am officially the worst wingman (chick) ever.
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
Cory and I accidentally had a sexual adventure last night.
How do you ACCIDENTALLY have a sexual adventure?
Definitely had a dick in my ass while watching the Seahawks win. Best NFC Championship game ever.
Dude, fate has brought her to your penis.
Congrats you've received dick pics from an Olympic silver medalist
Told a guy at the bar I was hurricane evacuees with no place to stay. Just woke up at his place. God bless Florence
The kid with the ed hardy shirt put a bunch of random shit in the washer and turned it on. example: a hanger, the movie Chocolate with Johnny Depp, and your mom's cat
Randomize
