we got a new version of the plan b at the pharmacy now. its called next choice. you would think they would come up with better names for these things.
Soo both my 8 year old sister and fuck buddy are named Sarah..
this can't be going anywhere good
nooope. guess which one i texted last nite to come over so i could "punish her pussy"? =\
We should have parties more often. I ended up with 90 beers and someone cleaned my toilet.
come on don't hate me. your brother looks just like you its almost a complement that i had sex with him.
Is it obsessive that I keep picking my crazy sex rug burn scab so it leaves a scar I can remember him by?
just threw up on my speech test, so much for a great semester
We shoved chex mix between her tits for her own survival.
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
I lost count after the 4th body shot but I think I'm wearing at least 3 different peoples clothes.
All i remember is Liz dragging me home yelling at me, crying, and barfing
He has in a pan: ten pieces of bacon, two cloves of garlic, an egg (not scrambled or hard boiled, just an egg) and frozen corn.
I also love beards. The playoffs are like christmas for my vagina.
He made me choke him and call him Papi..so all in all a good night.
Just showed my drunk fiancé where I got circumcised, she's been crying for twenty minutes.
What you have to understand is that our lives aren't a disappointment so much as they crashed and burned with lethal doses of radiation and dog shit.
Randomize
