You should see what I'm doing to your stuffed animals
i barfeds in our rink
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
Hahah fuuuck, bag pipers played around me while I threw up. Literally
I'm taking stock of m life as of right now and my Friday night plans are to drink a 30 rack by myself so I can have a tv stand when it is finished
You left the resturant and came back with a McDonalds burger in your pocket so ya...no more pregaming birthday dinners. Especially since it wasn't your birthday.
Siri just called me GayBoy in front of my family. I will destroy you.
What kind of gift says "I'm sorry you accidentally stuck your hands in my puke (even though you should know better by now)"?
all i know is there's a picture on my phone of him wearing my purple sweatpants and licking the bottom of my foot.
I have a boner in one of my pics with her which no one noticed.
It's like she fell out of an MTV reality show and no one knows how to send her back
were you aware we were supposed to be taking care of her hamster this weekend?
I should not have moved in with him. He's got porn stashed everywhere like a homosexual squirrel.
You love porn!
Not in the sugar bowl when I'm making my Mom coffee I don't.
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
Randomize
