you're bored at work aren't you?
I'm toying with the idea of beating off under my desk
She told me she was a cowboys fan... I told her it was a waste of a perfect set of tits
just took my ibuprofen with ramen broth, yay college
we need to stop having unprotected sex.
ya i know. we're like the secret life of the american whores.
We hadn't had sex in so long that I started queefing and then I couldn't stop giggling... I think he's mad.
I'm taking this break up pretty rough.. I've never been to sad to masturbate.
The girl who overdosed in the bathroom at work is back....help?
once you started introducing yourself as "running-bear" i knew you were beyond fucked up
He sent me a picture of his ass and said the backdoor is open. Almost grabbed my keys and a condom before I saw it was a group text. Not nearly drunk enough for his desperation.
i'm gonna fuck his crew, i'm gonna wax my asshole. i'm gonna make them all cry tears of sex joy then move to colorado.
I was orgasming and dying of laughter at the same time. I think I've found the One.
And he's in a frat. Everyone in a frat is gay. It's science.
This is the best thing we've done since that time we started a religion
I loaned him a tie and then had to tie it for him. I'm like his weird lesbian girlfriend.
you face planting the wall was epic
did you at least save my tooth
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