dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
When I was with my girlfriend I was averaging 1 random hookup a week. In the 2 months I've been single I haven't got any. I think I need her back.
His penis is literally smaller than my cell phone. I can't go out like that.
I wanna get freshman fucked up and do shady things on the last Friday of my youth.
yeah we're mixing orange juice, vodka, and rum and calling it Oj Simpson On Trial
She was a little hefty, so I turned on the strobe light in our room. Everything looks better with a strobe light.
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
We're you guys there last night when everyone started chanting "Nacho Steph"? Someone picked me up, carried me to the nacho cheese and made me do a nacho cheese stand.
Yep. I'm going to buy a sex toy and a LARP prop on the same trip. Welcome to my life.
Some girl dressed in nothing but Wonder Woman underwear and a cape on her ass just started twerking all over us. Remind me why I'd never been to a midnight of Rocky horror before?
And you are going to be so turned on by my batman skills later
I only spent $42 at the bar last night, it's some sort of miracle.
you do remember it was dollar beer night, right?
That answers my next five questions
I just had a flashback to me puking and you telling me it was okay because my boobs still looked awesome.
Hypothetically, I throw a party and my ex-boyfriend and my current fuck buddy are in the same house... what should I do?
How many beds are in the house? Hypothetically...
Randomize
