alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
My doctor just informed me that my food allergies qualify me for a medical marijuana license. I get it on Tuesday. It won't help at all, but my life is awesome!
I shouldn't have to say "get your balls off my counter" on a Wednesday.
The melted ice in my drinks tonight is probably the most water I've had in like 3 days accumulated.
So I commented on one of his pictures "who do I have to give a full effort blow job to, to get the Ides of March movie poster behind you" he responded with a number that wasn't his. I still texted it. I love that movie.
No it's okay, we're just driving to random places with the portable stripper pole and causing a ruckus.
Oh that's normal
When he sent me a picture, I swear my vag frowned. That tiny.
Such a good question, let's ask the alcohol gods for the answer.
he was having a black light party and drinking manischewitz wine out of a three foot tall trophy he stole from mcdonald's...that's when I decided it was time to leave
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
I touched the butt once. 'Twas an experience with the greatness of legend. So I touched it once more.
I'm still, like... really stoked about not having any STDs
WE ARE DOOMED.
And not the good kind of doomed. Assuming there is one.
it isn't the robot apocalypse that's for sure
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
I'm seriously considering selling my books back early. I don't use them anyways and I could really use the beer money..
Randomize
